Gail Evans

• B.Sc. (Hons) M.Sc.
• CQSW.
• Relate Cert CC.
• Dip. PST.
• Relate Cert. Supervision.
• EMDR.
• BASRT Accred.
• UKCP Reg.

I have many years experience in relationship and sexual therapy (couples and individuals). I offer EMDR a specialised approach to symptoms after traumatic experiences. I also work with sexual abuse. My background is in work with families and children.

A good counselling relationship is vital for effective counselling. I aim to be supportive encouraging and honest. I hope you can be honest with me too. An individual with your own way of looking at life you are the expert on yourself. I can't tell you what to do or what will work for you but I will discuss any insights or techniques I think might help and check if they are acceptable to you.

It can be surprisingly helpful to tell your story. It is rare to talk with someone who tries to listen carefully understand help make connections and accept without judging. Many have experienced damaging prejudice or criticism. It is reassuring to find we are not abnormal or going mad for our reactions to events in our lives.

Some need help to express emotions. You may find other ways easier than speaking e.g. drawing writing using objects to represent experiences. Having made sense of them we can think more clearly make decisions take action. Particular techniques can be useful: sex therapy for sexual problems; EMDR and healthy coping mechanisms for flashbacks bad dreams and troubling symptoms after trauma (inc. repeated minor traumas and burn-out); cognitive behavioural work helps change unwanted patterns of thinking and behaviour.

Examples of common general relationship issues:

• Affairs.
• Communication and intimacy.
• Control struggles.
• Loss of trust and respect.
• Life transitions e.g. becoming a family retirement.
• Wider family issues and disagreements e.g. in-laws step-family.
• Arguments e.g. over money parenting time for the relationship who does what petty things.
• Patterns of behaviour and communication from previous relationships or family of origin including effects of abuse.
• Effects on the relationship of illness disability depression etc (either partner or family).
• Effects on the relationship of the wider world work discrimination financial problems.

Examples of common sexual issues:

• Confusion over sexual identity.
• Lack of sexual information and knowledge.
• Loss of interest and desire in men and women including effects of relationship problems.
• Body image.
• Painful intercourse (men and women).
• Life changes e.g. pregnancy menopause aging.
• Loss of confidence including erection problems and starting new relationships e.g. after being divorced or widowed.
• Orgasm problems in men and women (inc. premature and retarded ejaculation).
• Effects on the sexual relationship of physical problems e.g. illness disability.
• Effects of previous sexual experiences including rape and sexual abuse.
• The role of pornography or sexual addictions.